YAHOO!!!!!

We passed Parquet. We have been approved by yet another Haitian government agency. Our paperwork now goes to the court system so our adoption of Marcus can be approved.
Praise God. One dear friend was here when I got the call and she said "It seems like God brings you to the brink of despair every time." And then I get good news and hope is restored.

Church today had a profound impact on my current attitude towards our adoption journey. I have been struggling with apathy vascilating to deep despair. I go weeks without thinking about it then am forced to confront the reality of someone else tucking in my son night after night. Then the sorrow gets to be almost palpable.

I so want to feel God carrying me through this journey but realize it has been too painful to rehash it regularly in prayer with Him.

However three realities struck me during church this morning. It sure would be nice if I could make it through a church service without crying at some point :)

I will list them and allow you to interpret and enjoy them in your own way.

1. This is my fathers world

Why should my heart be sad

The Lord is king, let the heavens ring

God reigns, let the earth be glad

This is my fathers world

The battle is not done

Jesus who died shall be satisfied

And heaven and earth be one.

2. (Song) And all that borrows life from thee is ever in thy care

And everywhere that man can be, thou God art present there.

3. (Prayer) In the struggle and pain that is present in this day

Redeemer, may I feel the peace of your presence.

On a lighter note, Marcus is doing so well according to our updates. He looks so much happier and like he is actually enjoying the pictures. He is so precious. We eagerly anticipate the new pictures every month. I wonder what his voice sounds like, what makes him laugh, what is he thinking about? His facial expressions make we question all of this. Here is a taste.

My prayer shall be "Redeemer, may I feel the peace of your presence."

Our Children- The past week

Playing music with Mom

Holding onto that last piece of graham cracker.

Hanging with Papa.

Happy with food, must be a Deters
Checking it out. . .

The beauty of Haiti

Loving to sleep on laps.
Matea at the Detroit Zoo
Bri at the Tigers game.  A true fan

Wow, what a surreal experience. How do you put into words that past three days? We experienced the entire range of emotions over the past couple days. From surprise, to joy, to concern, to anxiety, to peace, to pride, to unrelenting relief.

Marcus is such a sweet little boy. Such a gentle nature, always preferring to cuddle up on my lap. He was so shy at first, then really warming up to us towards the end. He loves to play with blocks and watches EVERYTHING. He really became a mama's boy over the two days we were there. (That might have something to do with the fact that white men are very rare, thus terrifying to him at this point.)  We did get to meet with the US Embassy, so Marcus' US visa process is started.  Thanks for your many prayers re: this appointment.

While we very much enjoyed the time we had with him, it was a perfect amount. Any more, and it would have been very painful to leave. We know God has his hand on Marcus and will sustain both us and him until we can be together as a complete family of five. We felt his peace through this whole trip, and continue to rely on your prayers to sense His hand and presence.  

We continue pray for miracles and God's will for our lives.

Haiti - Here We Come!!

So in our whirlwind style, Steve and I are flying to Haiti on Tuesday to complete some paperwork and more importantly, to meet Marcus.  I can't believe it is really happening.  As most of you know we have put off this trip for a while because of the uncertainty of the situation.  However, our caseworker told us we really need to make this trip soon, and no time like the present.  While I was really apprehensive about making this trip, now that it is booked, I am really excited.  I can't believe that in less than a week, I will have met Marcus.  Pray for us, it will be a short trip.  We leave on Tuesday and come back on Thursday.  YIKES.

Praise God

It appears we finally have gotten our break. . . We just received word that we are out of IBESR. And without a presidential dispensation. I can't believe it has finally happened, we are moving once again. We have quite a ways to go yet but at least we are making progress. Won't you join us in a prayer of praise?

Now we just have to keep going so Bri and Tea' can put a smile on this little face.

Okay, so as I am sure you have figured, absolutely nothing happened at the meeting on Wednesday. No progress has been made about the slow movement of adoptions from Haiti. While we continue to hope, my hope is much more guarded.
I had a rough couple of days on Sunday and Monday since Monday was Marcus' second birthday. We initially thought he would be home by now so that hit me pretty hard. Thanks to all who were praying for me, I did pull myself together eventually.
My primary response to all the adoption struggles thus far has been anger. (For those of you who know me, big surprise, righteous anger is always my first response.) However, this time it was just pure, unadulterated despair. It hit me for the first time that this child is ours and he is growing up without us. I was sad, not mad, or trying to fix it, just sad. Steve pointed out that this was a positive since he has always been attached to Marcus, posting pictures, etc. While I have kept myself more distant. I replied by saying it is so much easier when you don't feel anything and I was doing so good for so long at not feeling.
My dear friend suggested that I start a fast for a while to focus on God through this whole process and redirect my thoughts on Him. So stay posted, I may ask you all to join me.
On a lighter note, we have had a bad smell in our home for the past 3-4 days. I wasn't sure if it was sewer or a dead animal in the walls or what. The most frustrating thing was that the smell moved. Today I went on a smell hunt and found the culprit. Two once-beautifully-decorated hard-boiled eggs in a backpack. Mushy and dripping and foul as all get out. Apparently my resident packrat Matea, thought a backpack was a great place for keeping old eggs. However, the backpacks mobility did explain the roving smell. Oh, the joys of motherhood. Maybe God hasn't brought Marcus home because I can't control the two I already have. :)
Joy and Peace to you all on this beautiful summer day.
Crystal